Spring is Coming

discontent brewing
a cyclical happenstance whittling away at my sanity
the booming voice of reckoning lures me to widening possibility,
but without the indication of subtlety.

gliding on hope and misspent motivation
here, in the garden of good intentions, I am weakening.
wide-eyed insomnia present,
wisps of malevolence looming over each dreaded morning

There is a way out of this, there is.
Miles from here in a saddened bunker –
I have stored away my secret weapon:
experience in hibernation.

3.12.2009
JMG

On the Verge of my 26th Birthday

tick, tick, tower
my luck is crumbling to make room for progress
perception skipping a broken tune
early rising to early riser
this is it, now

bloated reality punctured by tiny pin pricks
each held by individual emotions
“enough!” they repeat,
but it’s still the opposite.

11.13.2008
JMG

Sting

My optimism abounds
swirling around me occasionally
Occasionally I have enough faith to believe in myself
Occasionally I can actually taste the beauty

a delicious contrast with how the 9-5 makes me feel
dead inside and inadequate
failing with my flailings

More than anything – I am searching for something to believe in
some cause to fight for
a smile to imagine the eventual departure

There are some things you wouldn’t understand –
being a man and having the equipment to better assert yourself –
it is exhausting to be respectful while knowing you are not at all respected.

Is it too much to want to be appreciated?
Too much to be treated with respect, as opposed to less than human?

I am not gum or shit on your shoe.
Do not continue to underestimate me.

10.8.2008
JMG