More often than not I am
catastrophe careening toward oblivion –
suffocating and sensing myself drifting away
particle by particle.
In an attempt to stop
the surrender I occasionally put a little effort in.
One step following the other,
occasionally I am awake and myself enough to put on the separate face –
the one I wear when I am most aware of you.
In my head / in my dreams
angrily from the threshold of being.
Tumbling point over point toward everything I hate the most
and the state of being I most envy.
Often, it is the stillness that most frightens me. That and
the aching perception that perhaps I haven’t reached the level I hoped I’d reach.
Instead trembling close to the wire,
close to the nest of good enough dreams while the ache in my fingers
just keeps aching.
*Note: I am not pleased the the formatting in WordPress. The original version came off much, much better.