Tag Archives: divorce

7/18/2017 Writing Prompt

When you must invoke the contract

Advertisements
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

My anger has wings

My ex-husband cheated on me with one of his coworkers. I walked in on them when he thought I would be gone and he, in typical fashion, told me it was my fault it happened. At this instant, I stood up to him. Told him this was not something he could flip back on me.

He was 30, she was 23. They’re together now and I am fairly certain the same thing will happen to her. Because that’s just the way of things. I feel justified and I also feel terribly sad for her because she doesn’t know any better. Because he’s a damaged human being. Because he will flip his insecurities back on her and make her -always- feel like she is less than her true worth.

I want to hate her, but I can’t fully. I can only feel sorry for her ignorance, for her own youthful arrogance. But also, I have absolutely no respect for her existence, because she knew better, but continued the encounter anyway.

There is justice in this world, but it is subtle. And I may never know the outcome of their conjoined misery, but I can feel in my heart of hearts that I tried to do the right thing.

Above all, I am free. Despite the horror of walking in on them, I am thankful for that encounter because now I am free.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

untethered heart

untethered heart
Johanna M. Vining

one year ago I
found my fear nestled on the couch
ring to wall my voice broke the last barrier

no lesson harder learned
smug, he peered then attempted to flip the argument
my fault, but not and so I finally said so

following the disaster, I crumpled, then
swept up the pieces, placed ice in the carpet pockets
waited

gulped wine while tracking back:
found myself living within song
wailing loss and hope and relief

more than three steps forward
no longing looks back
blown kiss caught by my own face

10.21.2014

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,